joshsux:

Do you ever just jiggle your butt

(Source: precumming, via crystallized-teardrops)

79,001 notes

the-yolocaust:

please do not be mean to dogs they are only trying to help

(Source: swarnpert, via fake-mermaid)

481,831 notes

userbar:

greetings:

people who use “lol” and “xD” in the same sentence are the kind of people who should never be trusted

i know right lol xD

(via tipslip)

67,407 notes

suctioning:

aciddd-angel:

suctioning:

when you unsuspectingly see your best friend at the store

image

why the fuck would this be my reaction

You must not have a best friend

(via scroturn)

103,712 notes
colamania:

spazztastikim:

comebackxkid:

dynastylnoire:

insidehishead:

some of the most sensitive areas of the female body

look at all the regions that are not titties and vagina guys
porn has lied to you. there are other places you can touch that sensitive and pleasurable. 

Oh yeah because I’m just gonna rub her eyes until a she’s horny

Kiss her there you walnut! Use tenderness! Hold her face gently and stroke her eyelids with your thumb and then kiss them! Run your hands down to her neck when you do! THINK!!! Lordie, you have a lot to learn that TOUCH gives more than making her “horny” you’ll drive her nuts doing gentle stuff! It’s trust! It’s care! It’s sensitivity! *smacks your forehead* You want her to be numb in complete ecstasy! I know this shit and I’m ASEXUAL! 

Reblogging purely for the beautiful use of the word “walnut” as an insult.

rip-homegirl:

let’s talk about the universe and make out

(Source: brujabby, via unshaped)

409,873 notes

petewanks:

if u see me smiling in public it means im laughing at the jokes i tell myself in my head 

(Source: petewanks, via fake-mermaid)

772,989 notes

4thofjulys:

either that was a firework or another tribute is dead 

(Source: literallyrad, via tipslip)

276,783 notes

castiel-is-wonderful:

sionainnlindsay:

castiel-is-wonderful:

WAIT HOLD THE FUCK UP

IS ‘MRS’ JUST MR’S 

LIKE BELONGING TO MR

OMG

Mr comes from the French monsieur, which I think literally translates as ‘my lord’ and basically just means master, and Mrs comes from maistre which is the feminine form of master, so actually—for once—no.

This was an extremely relevant comment and I thank you for educating me 

(Source: khaleeesii, via scroturn)

246,216 notes

actionables:

SERIOUSLY BE NICE TO YOUR ANIMALS BECAUSE THEY LOVE YOU MORE THAN YOU DESERVE AND MORE THAN ANY HUMAN EVER WILL

(via crystallized-teardrops)

579,624 notes